Compassion Blog

Empathy Burnout aka Compassion Fatigue

Intentionally living a life of kindness and with the strong belief that everyone's needs matter means that sometimes I can feel drained and that I have no more to give. Empathy burnout can happen when I'm spending so much of my time caring for and thinking about...

Black Skivvy

He was wearing a black skivvy and a leather jacket when I met him. He had consistent favourites that he wore: black skivvy, ethnic shirts, jeans. I wanted to have him cremated in that black skivvy but I couldn’t find it even though I looked hard. I gave up and ended...

The gift of the Present Tense

One of my dilemmas since my husband died is how to gently navigate my way through the inevitable moments of conversation when I'm not sure whether to explain that my husband died last year.   It's one of the great inconveniences of the English language that we have to...

Widow’s club

It's "the first Christmas". One of many firsts since my husband died. I somewhat hesitantly go to a Christmas gathering in the valley where I live. I bump into a friend whose husband died two weeks after mine and we start chatting to a woman we know who lost her...

The space to just BE

My 15 year old and I are sitting with our friends. A discussion begins about the hairs on my son's thighs - my son laughingly complains about the way they are growing (randomly) and our friends gently tease him about them. I say "They're the same as Papa's leg hairs"....

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