It’s “the first Christmas”. One of many firsts since my husband died. I somewhat hesitantly go to a Christmas gathering in the valley where I live. I bump into a friend whose husband died two weeks after mine and we start chatting to a woman we know who lost her husband three years ago.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch.” she says, “It’s my third Christmas without him and it isn’t actually getting any easier.”. Tears well up in her eyes and gently slide down her face. “The widows’ club is just not a club I want to belong to. I’m sorry.”. She tells us a little more of how she is. It’s a struggle and she’s mainly just focused on her kids and their well-being – she has little left for herself at the end of the day. Then she hugs us and walks away.

And I get it. I really get it. It’s not a club I want to belong to either.

The Compassion Lounge Newsletter

The Compassion Lounge Newsletter

Subscribe to keep in touch with The Compassion Lounge events and updates. PLUS get your FREE Compassionate Communication charts to support your journey and take the first step in learning to be kinder to yourself and others.

"I found your honest sharing so informative and helpful and the charts even more so. Wow the timing is so fortuitous Filippa. I'm so grateful, thank you." Sheree Lepper

WELCOME! Check your email for our welcome email and your FREE charts.